OPENS APRIL 25, CERT 15, 106 MINS

Everything about this slice of uber-trash is insane. Remember John McNaughton’s Wild Things?so over-the-top that it was both atrocious and brilliant? Trapped is its mad twin, the one they lock in the attic. Anything casting Kevin Bacon and Courtney Love (neither of whom has ever consciously under-acted) as a pair of deranged kidnappers has to have loads going for it, however hysterically flawed.

In brief: Bacon grabs Charlize Theron while Love nabs Stuart Townsend; they delegate minding the kid to Pruitt Taylor Vince and demand money. Kev tries to take advantage of Charlize; she nearly castrates him with a scalpel she’s hidden down her butt-crack. Meanwhile Stuart, an anaesthesiologist, sends Courtney into a coma, which is a minor detour from the class-A drugs this ‘actress’ seems to be enjoying from the off. Eventually a plane chases a van, and Townsend cuts the engine so he can get a better signal on his mobile. With plot points like this, who needs logic?

Quite the most ludicrous hokum imaginable, and thus obscenely entertaining.