Opens January 31, Cert 12A, 142 mins

After Spielbergโ€™s giant strides towards darker intelligence in Minority Report, this is a relapse. A misconceived โ€˜comedy-thrillerโ€™, itโ€™s long, dreary and, for a tale about a conman, laughably sanitised. Though the story eschews sugary family values, theyโ€™re tediously shoehorned in.

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Leonardo DiCaprio appeases any fanbase he mightโ€™ve challenged via Scorsese by playing likeable fraudster Frank Abagnale, on whose autobiography this is based. In the late โ€™60s, Frank poses as a pilot, doctor and lawyer, all before his 21st birthday. Inspired by his father (Christopher Walken), he survives on quick wits (though you wouldnโ€™t know it from DiCaprioโ€™s listless form). FBI agent Carl Hanratty (Tom Hanks, working hard) vows to bring him down.

Chronologically a mess, this sexless plodder tries to surf on breezy anecdotes about the rogue (much like Ted Demmeโ€™s Blow). The period detailโ€™s groovy, but Spielberg drenches it in a gushing golden glow. Why Frank falls for a dense, servile girl (Amy Adams) is barely examined. Martin Sheen and Nathalie Baye paper over cracks. It never catches fire.